i hate this time of year.
this time of year where i probably grow 23409754 white hairs. where i stress but for what. why do i have to stress over something so small. it makes no sense. well, it doesnt make sense to you. but it sure make a lot of sense to me. and everyday i get angry. like what the f**k is wrong with my attitude. i hate it. i wish i could change it. sadly, i cant. and it has taken over my life. but i thats my fault. there isnt anyone at fault here. but me.
i get angry because of you. because you tell me to do every single thing YOU dont want to do. but then when i get angry you get angry and that makes no sense to me. but you dont care if it makes sense to me or not.
and i hate how during this time the worst of me comes out and how all these negative thoughts pop into my head. i hate how i want to die. but isnt wanting to kill yourself just so selfish. yeah. i think so. but how can you not want to if you feel worthless.
i need life to move faster. but we dont always get what we want.
august and september, you will kill me slowly.